How does one “drink like an ultra”? Copiously and often. The truth is, each ultra has their own tastes and preferences when it comes to adult beverages, but put up a common front on the question of which drink best embodies the haunted spirit of the Ultra: The Cromulent Fuckcrustable.
Roughly invented by me, self_and_other, named by Will, and enjoyed by many, this simple mixed drink can be modified more or less to taste, but I will outline the basic proportions of how I make one, while perhaps other ultras will provide their own dissenting views in future recipes.
Start with about 40 mL of good mixing whiskey, a blend with a good amount of rye in it will do. Add this to a shaker with plenty of ice. To this add the juice of half of a navel orange – this is meant to be a sweet drink and so you want a navel orange or something similarly sweet and not a tart or astringent orange. Now go to your liquor cabinet and grab your bottle of Benedictine, add about 20 mL of it (I eyeball this I don’t give a shit). Finally, finish with a dash of dark, semi-sweet amaro. Shake it until your hands are numb and then it’s cold enough to serve, no one ever garnishes it.
The spirit of the drink is that you can screw around with the proportions to your liking. The Benedictine is non-negotiable to the flavour of it, but if you want to use bourbon for example that’s fine. I like an Irish or similarly styled whiskey with more spice and less overtly sweet oak flavour to balance the sweetness of the other ingredients but you may not. Use a Mandarin orange if it suits you, it’s what I would do in almost any other drink. I don’t think anyone else uses the amaro, and bitters would be a more conventional choice, but I like what it adds.
Is this drink as good as a well-composed Manhattan? Probably not. But it’s the best use I have found for Benedictine and it is a favourite of Ukraine’s most radiation-poisoned football club’s most ardent brigade of supporters and it could become yours as well.